Why Do We Feel Pressured To Have Our Lives Together in Our 20’s?

I feel like a lot of you are like me in the sense that you are just graduating college or are in your mid 20’s. People say that these are the best days of your life but recently I haven’t been feeling like it is. So I’m graduating college this year and although that is amazing, it comes with a lot of stress. It has me thinking what do I really want to do from my degree, where do I want to live, when will I move out of my parents and start my own life, when will I be able to afford my own car and have complete independence? There’s 1,000 questions going round my head and at the minute I can’t answer one of them. Which is pretty daunting and doesn’t help someone who has anxiety at all!

But the point of this post isn’t to tell you how much I’m freaking out, it’s to talk about the fact that we are all pressured by society to think that we have to have all these things sorted at such a young age. I mean, I am 21, nearly 22 and I feel like I should be on my way to owning my own home, definitely my own car but also feel like I should have my life career up and running by now even though I just finished college a week ago… I know I’m not the only one that feels it as I have seen so many of you talking about the exact same thing as well. So why do we all feel it?

Love, Lauren Ellen

I don’t have the perfect answer as I think everyone’s reasoning may be different but I know for myself that it is the life that I see on social media and from some people around me. I know people my age who seem to have it all together. They have a house, car and are even settling down and getting married or having kids! All of those things feel so far away for me, some of that I am very happy with but some I’m not. I feel the need to constantly be on top of every part of my life but who are we kidding, that’s an impossible task that no human being can cope with. We have to live our lives day by day but in today’s society it seems like such a hard thing to do.

I read a post on Instagram today about a girl saying that she constantly needs to tell herself everyday to stop worrying about the future but to also stop thinking of the past. It’s so easy to get caught up in times of both the future and the past and forget that in the moment, there is nothing wrong with your life. So many things can change in a day, week, month or year that you can’t really plan for anything that life may throw at you. I don’t think that feeling pressured to have my life together will go immediately but working on it everyday is something that I am definitely going to work on. I am 22 at the end of the day, and I and you, by no means need to have everything sorted out. Graduating college is stressful enough without having to think about where I see myself in a few months time. Don’t get me wrong, it can be exciting to think about the future, especially if you have exciting plans but sometimes it is so daunting and the last thing I need to be thinking about on the lead up to my last exams.

But it’s in the times procrastinating for exams that your mind really starts to wonder. Was it worth it, all those four years of stress. To then finish college without a job, pretty much in the same predicament you were in when you started college at 18? College was such an amazing experience that I wouldn’t take a minute of it back but I suppose that I feel that I could be so much further along with life if I had never have gone? It’s a tough one… I think for now, it’s important for me not to think about the future and to leave it in God’s hands. As He is the only one that knows the beginning from the end and there is nothing that I can do to predict it.

It’s a daunting time in life, being in your 20’s and not yet knowing what life holds for you. But enjoying every minute and every ride we are taken on is something that we all must do. What do you think? Are you an over thinker/worrier when it comes to your future? Do you ever feel like you need to have your life together this young?

Thank you for reading,